Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
