he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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