Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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