my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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