Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
