I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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