I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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