help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
