Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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