worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Randomize
