Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize