Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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