Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
