I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Randomize
