Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
