I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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