No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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