It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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