After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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