we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
There r osticjed everywhere
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
