he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
