I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize