At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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