idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Randomize
