If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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