can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
