No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
