He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize