thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
