I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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