We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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