i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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