i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Can i not drive my cunt home
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
organizing the empties. That sober.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
