no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My balls are so social today.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
