I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
