Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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