if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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