Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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