He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
