Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
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