My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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