he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
