do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize