got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
