She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
