I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
