here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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