Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
