After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
