WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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